A wee bit o' jocularity for the true heroes of the medical field,...

Papa Red · medicine forum beginner Joined: 21 Feb 2005 Posts: 4

It is a nurse who went against her commander's orders, who risked her
career and literally saved my life,...To her and all of you Grand folks,
I wish you all the very best, and hope that this gives ya a wee laugh.
Pax Vobiscum,...~Dean.
=+=+=+=+=+=+{o0O0o}+=+=+=+=+=+NURSES
["Nurses....God love 'em!"]
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1. Did you hear about the nurse who died and was sent to hell by
mistake? It took her two whole weeks before she realize that she wasn't
at work!
`
2. You know you're a nurse if... you would like to meet the inventor of
the call light some night in a dark alley.
`
3. Your sense of humor gets more warped each year. Almost everything can
seem humorous...eventually.
`
4. You know the smell of different diarrhea to identify it.
`
5. You can tell the pharmacist more about the medication they are
dispensing than they know.
`
6. You check the caller ID on your day off to see if anyone from the
hospital is trying to call and ask you to work.
`
7. You've been telling stories in a restaurant and made someone at
another table throw up.
`
8. You notice that you are using more 4 letter words than you did before
you started nursing.
`
9. Every time someone asks you for a pen you can find at least 4 of them
on you.
`
10. You live by the motto "to be right is only half the battle, to
convince the doctor is more difficult."
`
11. You've told a confused patient that your name was that of your
coworker and to holler if they need help.
`
12. Your bladder can expand to the size of a Winnebago's water tank.
`
13. You find yourself checking out other customer's veins in grocery
waiting lines.
`
14. You avoid unhealthy-looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they
will drop near you and you will have to do CPR on your day off.
`
15. Your finger has gone places you never thought possible.
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16. You have seen more penises than any prostitute.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nurses In The *Spooky Dept.
-
In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same
bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 a.m., regardless of their medical
condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do
with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the
deaths occurred around 11:00 am.
A worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of
the incidents.
The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 am., all of the
doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for
themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding
wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the
evil spirits.
*****Just when the clock struck 11:00, Georgie Johnson, the part-time
Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system
so he could use the *VACUUM-CLEANER!
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