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mac1
medicine forum beginner
Joined: 29 Apr 2005
Posts: 16
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 Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2005 2:47 pm Post subject:
Physically weak from stay in bed
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Because my 80 yr. old dad refused to see a doctor until it was almost to
late; he must now a urinary catheter and bag for the rest of his life, With
failing vision, and depression that followed, he has lost interest in most
things and has taken to his bed.
During my last visit, he was staying up a little more as each day passed
and promised me that after I went back home he would continue doing so...as
he had regained most of his strength, but unfortunately, I had to return
home (which is out of state) and sadly, he returned to his old ways...Well
since my last visit, he has gotten only weaker. His only outings seem to be
to the doctors office. I am going back to stay with next week and would like
to know how I can safely reintroduce his body to the stress of being up. His
wife tells me that he's so very weak that even a short trip to the restroom
tires him out.
Dad's again, talking about staying up when I come to stay with him ... But
being a layperson I'm very concerned as to what or how, I can safely
encourage him to stay-up in his weakened condition. Any information as to
what I might do, or what I need to be aware of would be appreciated.
Thank you. |
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Norminn
medicine forum Guru Wannabe
Joined: 05 May 2005
Posts: 157
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| Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2005 4:59 pm Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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mac1 wrote:
| Quote: | Because my 80 yr. old dad refused to see a doctor until it was almost to
late; he must now a urinary catheter and bag for the rest of his life, With
failing vision, and depression that followed, he has lost interest in most
things and has taken to his bed.
During my last visit, he was staying up a little more as each day passed
and promised me that after I went back home he would continue doing so...as
he had regained most of his strength, but unfortunately, I had to return
home (which is out of state) and sadly, he returned to his old ways...Well
since my last visit, he has gotten only weaker. His only outings seem to be
to the doctors office. I am going back to stay with next week and would like
to know how I can safely reintroduce his body to the stress of being up. His
wife tells me that he's so very weak that even a short trip to the restroom
tires him out.
Dad's again, talking about staying up when I come to stay with him ... But
being a layperson I'm very concerned as to what or how, I can safely
encourage him to stay-up in his weakened condition. Any information as to
what I might do, or what I need to be aware of would be appreciated.
Thank you.
|
My first thought would be to contact his physician and ask for home
health care to do physical therapy. Social worker consult a
possibility, as well. What physical/medical problems does he have?
Reason for indwelling cath? What social connections or opportunites do
they have? City or country? House or apt? Former work or interests?
Using mobility aids, such as walker? I've known people with severe
limitations who adapted and had the good fortune to be able to help each
other - depression can be, as you have stated, a really limiting
problem. Hard to tell which comes first sometimes - depression
resulting from physical problems or vice versa. |
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mac1
medicine forum beginner
Joined: 29 Apr 2005
Posts: 16
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| Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2005 7:14 pm Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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"Norminn" <norminn@earthlink.net> wrote in message
news:4273D555.5060408@earthlink.net...
| Quote: |
My first thought would be to contact his physician and ask for home health
care to do physical therapy. Social worker consult a possibility, as
well. What physical/medical problems does he have? Reason for indwelling
cath? What social connections or opportunites do they have? City or
country? House or apt? Former work or interests? Using mobility aids,
such as walker? I've known people with severe limitations who adapted and
had the good fortune to be able to help each other - depression can be, as
you have stated, a really limiting problem. Hard to tell which comes
first sometimes - depression resulting from physical problems or vice
versa.
|
I will definitely contact home health care about starting physical therapy
in his home.
Regarding his medical problem: It began with an uncontrollable urine leakage
and simply not feeling well. Unfortunately, Dad never discusses how bad he
feels until hospitalization is required.
So, once the family knew about his problem they repeatedly pleaded with him
to see a urologist...finally he agreed. His appointment wait was 1 month
out. In the meantime his health became worse and physically collapsed twice.
I feared he was having mini strokes. The paramedics were called...he refused
transport. He told them that he would wait for his scheduled appointment
with his urologist. The paramedics said that there was nothing further they
could do as he was coherent and refused help.
Long story-short... he's lucky to be alive as his urologist said his kidneys
had begun to shut down. There was a blockage preventing the bladder from
emptying. Today, the end result is that he cannot urinate on his own and has
been relegated to living with a catheter and bag. Being a proud man, he will
not go anywhere (besides a doctors office) wearing a leg bag . His problem
is also complicated with the fact that because of severe arthritis in his
hands they have become almost useless. And therefore, cannot manage a clamp
for his bag.
Last week, I ordered a "Belly Bag" manufactured by Life-Tech, which I hope
will be helpful as there is no clamping device required to empty the bay...
a simple twist and it empties and a twist in the opposite direction closes
it. A big plus is that the bag is worn around the waist (no hanging tubes).
I hope it helps to restore his sense of dignity.
About a social worker: They came out yesterday. She asked if he would like a
walker. He emphatically said that he did not want one. Again it goes back to
his strong pride.
Sadly, The road ahead (for Dad) doesn't look very bright as his primary care
doctor has also begun to treat him for early stages of senile dementia.
That's about it... thank you again for your suggestion. |
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Starlight
medicine forum Guru Wannabe
Joined: 30 Apr 2005
Posts: 186
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| Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2005 10:23 pm Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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On Sat, 30 Apr 2005 17:14:29 -0400, "mac1" <mac1@nospam.com> wrote:
| Quote: | About a social worker: They came out yesterday. She asked if he would like a
walker. He emphatically said that he did not want one. Again it goes back to
his strong pride.
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Perhaps a good physical therapist who develops a rapport with him will
be able to convince him that a walker will be good for his safety, and
give his wife and family peace of mind.
| Quote: | Sadly, The road ahead (for Dad) doesn't look very bright as his primary care
doctor has also begun to treat him for early stages of senile dementia.
|
We don't want to jump the gun or be negative, but it would be a good
idea for you (and possibly his wife) to talk about Assisted
Living/nursing homes in the area or about what you will do if/when he
becomes too much for his wife to handle at home. If he's refusing
exercize, it won't take long for him to become bedbound, and his
elderly wife will not be able to care for him without help. If his
dementia progresses, that may increase the difficulty of caring for
him.
Sometimes telling it like it is to the patient (if you don't exercize
and become too weak, you will not be able to stay here at home; we may
need to start investigating nursing homes because mom will not be able
to care for you without help) gives them some motivation to improve.
Remember, your dad is still mourning the loss of his independence and
vigor. It's going to take time for him to shake that off (if he can)
and find a routine that works for him.
It was nice of the social worker to offer him a walker, but something
like that will be better coming from a PT or a person who can prove to
him why he needs one.
We just went through something similiar with my father-in-law. With
repeated encouragement and exercize, he's now walking with a cane
instead of using a wheelchair. You will need patience, persistence,
professional help to help improve the quality of his and his wife's
remaining days. Good luck.
Becky |
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Mr-Natural-Health
medicine forum Guru
Joined: 01 May 2005
Posts: 1807
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| Posted: Sun May 01, 2005 7:36 pm Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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mac1 wrote:
| Quote: | Because my 80 yr. old dad refused to see a doctor until it was almost
to
late; ...
|
Perhaps, if you were to focus more?
Anybody who makes it to the age of 80 is a success story.
Many people are given bags in their 70's.
You probably wont make it past 70, and here your are knocking your old
man. Shame on you. |
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mac1
medicine forum beginner
Joined: 29 Apr 2005
Posts: 16
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| Posted: Sun May 01, 2005 8:28 pm Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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"Mr-Natural-Health" <johngohde@naturalhealthperspective.com> wrote in
message news:1114983403.566245.270870@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
| Quote: |
mac1 wrote:
Because my 80 yr. old dad refused to see a doctor until it was almost
to
late; ...
Perhaps, if you were to focus more?
Anybody who makes it to the age of 80 is a success story.
Many people are given bags in their 70's.
You probably wont make it past 70, and here your are knocking your old
man. Shame on you.
|
In actually, the real shame is that you didn't get the jest of what was
being said. You see, I'm trying to do the all I can to help improve the
quality of the life he has left. And in my book, that's not knocking my
dad...that's helping him. |
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guarnot
medicine forum addict
Joined: 01 May 2005
Posts: 65
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| Posted: Sun May 01, 2005 8:54 pm Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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mac1 wrote:
| Quote: | "Mr-Natural-Health" <johngohde@naturalhealthperspective.com> wrote in
message news:1114983403.566245.270870@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
mac1 wrote:
Because my 80 yr. old dad refused to see a doctor until it was
almost
to
late; ...
Perhaps, if you were to focus more?
Anybody who makes it to the age of 80 is a success story.
Many people are given bags in their 70's.
You probably wont make it past 70, and here your are knocking your
old
man. Shame on you.
In actually, the real shame is that you didn't get the jest of what
was
being said. You see, I'm trying to do the all I can to help improve
the
quality of the life he has left. And in my book, that's not knocking
my
dad...that's helping him.
|
The person who told you you were "knocking your old man" is a troll
(and he's also not a nurse, as he should be the first to tell you).
Don't let his idiotic comments get to you. He's always annoying, but in
this case--trying to needle someone who is obviously very concerned
about his father and wants to be able to help him--is just low. Ignore
him. Just about everyone else here does (but in this case I thought a
brief exception was called for). |
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mac1
medicine forum beginner
Joined: 29 Apr 2005
Posts: 16
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| Posted: Mon May 02, 2005 10:24 am Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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"guarnot" <guarnot@aol.com> wrote in message
news:1114988047.163700.264110@z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com...
| Quote: |
mac1 wrote:
"Mr-Natural-Health" <johngohde@naturalhealthperspective.com> wrote in
message news:1114983403.566245.270870@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
mac1 wrote:
Because my 80 yr. old dad refused to see a doctor until it was
almost
to
late; ...
Perhaps, if you were to focus more?
Anybody who makes it to the age of 80 is a success story.
Many people are given bags in their 70's.
You probably wont make it past 70, and here your are knocking your
old
man. Shame on you.
In actually, the real shame is that you didn't get the jest of what
was
being said. You see, I'm trying to do the all I can to help improve
the
quality of the life he has left. And in my book, that's not knocking
my
dad...that's helping him.
The person who told you you were "knocking your old man" is a troll
(and he's also not a nurse, as he should be the first to tell you).
Don't let his idiotic comments get to you. He's always annoying, but in
this case--trying to needle someone who is obviously very concerned
about his father and wants to be able to help him--is just low. Ignore
him. Just about everyone else here does (but in this case I thought a
brief exception was called for).
|
Thank you for the heads-up regarding that person.
> |
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Mr-Natural-Health
medicine forum Guru
Joined: 01 May 2005
Posts: 1807
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| Posted: Mon May 02, 2005 2:27 pm Post subject:
Re: Physically weak from stay in bed
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mac1 wrote:
| Quote: | Perhaps, if you were to focus more?
Anybody who makes it to the age of 80 is a success story.
Many people are given bags in their 70's.
You probably wont make it past 70, and here your are knocking your
old
man. Shame on you.
In actually, the real shame is that you didn't get the jest of what
was
being said.
|
Perhaps, if you were to focus more?
You were caught red handed criticizing your father.
I shall repeat. Your father is the person with all the brains here,
not you.
You probably wont make it past the age of 70. Rather than knocking
your father's decision not to kill himself by seeing a doctor, you
might have congratulated him for making it to the age of 80.
PS: If you get a nurse to take care of him in a residential setting,
the probability that the nurse will steal something from the house is
100%.
These grossly overpaid nurses feel that they are both overworked and
underpaid and accordingly that they are entitled to rob their victims
blind. |
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